I_____you SMS Messages282 messages

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Darling : When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Darling : Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem Can there be greater than this one?
Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist.
If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for seven years.
The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board overlooking an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.
The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.
Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.
The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump.
"Congratulations! You''re a free man. Just tell me why didn''t you jump?" asked the doctor.
To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can''t swim!"
If I was an artist,
you would be my picture!
If I was a poet,
you would be my inspiration!
If I was an author you would be my story!

But I''m only a cartoonist!
Teacher to student: "if your father earn $100,000 and give half of it to your mother,
what would she have?

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STUDENT: A Heart Attack....
When I was younger I hated going to weddings ... it seemed that all of my
aunts and the grandmotherly types used to come up to me, poking me in the
ribs and cackling, telling me, ''You''re next.''

They stopped that stuff after I started doing the same thing to them at
funerals..... :d
Teacher to student: "if your father earn $100,000 and give half of it to your mother,
what would she have?

.
.
.
.
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STUDENT: A Heart Attack.... :-D
Teacher: Simon, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother''s. Did you copy his?
Simon: No, teacher. It''s the same dog!
Life is chemistry:

Dilute your sorrows evaporate your worries
Filter your mistakes boil your ego
&
You will find crystals of love, joy and happiness in pure form..... :->
Easy Ways to Die :

Take a Cigar Daily - You will die 10 years early.

Drink Alcohal Daily - You will die 30 years early.

Love Someone Truly - You will die daily .... ;->
You can do so much in 10 minutes time. . .

Ten minutes, once gone, are gone for good. . .

Divide your life into 10-minute units



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sacrifice as few of them as possible in meaningless activity." ;->
A man inserted an ''ad'' in the classifieds: "Wife
wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
Do You Know The Best Way To Double Your Money. . . ?







Dont Know






Ok





I Tell U . . .






Just Fold It And Put It In Your Pocket . . . ;->