Main SMS Messages3698 messages

Patient to Doc: Aapne nurse bahut achhi rakhi hai, uska haath lagte hi Main theek ho gaya.
Doctor: Jaanta hu, thappar ki awaaz mujhe bhi sunai di thi
Agr dil ka nam Anda(egg)Hta tou films k nam is trha hoty,


Ye Anda apka hua,


Hum Anda de chuky snam,


Hum apke Andy Main rehty hain,


Andy waly dulhnya ly jain gy
Tumhare Liye Main Kutoo Ki Jan lesakta hu
Gutka le sakta hu pan le sakta hun..

Kaaway pakr k de sakta hu tumhare hath Main
Suraj per jasakta hun magar kya ha k rat Main..

tumhare liye Main so saal g sakta hun
tumhare liye Main teen glass lassii k pi sakta hu..

tumhare abba agr plain dila dein to tare tor k la sakta hu
shair agr nakli ho to ankhe phor k asakta hu..

itna bhadur hu k chupke se muhabbat ka dum bharta hu
tum se milne roz aoo magr tumhare abba se darta hu..
Ager pakre gaye to tere sare raz khol donga..
Aur
Ager burayi mujh pe ayi to bhare majme Main tujhe behan bol donga..
Once there were 3 guys praying..n all of a sudden da light goes off..
guy 1: "lo jee bijli tur gaye "
guy 2: "oay bewaqoof namaz parhdaya nahi bolday"
guy 3: "Shuker way Main nae boalya"
Dr: Aap pagal kaise huwe?
Pagal: kuch time pehle Main ne ek bewa se shadi ki us ki jawan beti ne mere baap se shadi ki: yun wo meri saas ban gaye,un k ghar beti hui to rishte mai wo meri behn hui kiun k Main us k baap ka beta tha,dosri taraf wo meri nawasi bhi hui, kiun k Main us ki nani ka shohar tha, is liye Main apni behn ka nana bana,phir mere ghar beta huwa, tu meri biwi ki beti, mere bete ki dadi bhi lagti thi kiun k wo meri soteli maa thi, chunache mera beta apni dadi ka bhai ban gaya aur Main apne bete ka bhanja aur....
Dr: bas karo! Khuda k wastay bas karo warna Main pagal hojaonga...
shama pe chala mukadma parwane ke khoon ka,
pucha gaya shama se kyun kiya khoon maasum ka,
shama boli...
parwana jawani ke nashe Main jhoom raha tha,
mere agge piche ghoom raha tha,
khoon na karti to kya karti,
bhari mehfil Main mujhe choom raha tha..
A sardar was passing thru a jungle.

A churail stops him and says: Hoo hoo ha ha ha,

Main churail hoon.

Sardar: Jaanta hoon, teri ek behan mere ghar bhi hai:-)
A man to Sardar : Aao ji chess khelein.


Sardar : Tu chal Main sports shoes pehen ke aata hun!!
What if Acountants start making Movies....

1 - Muna Bhai C.A,,

2 - Hamara Ledger apke pas hai,,

3 - Maine overdraft kyon kia,,

4 - Journal sey Balance Sheet tak,,

5 - Kabhi Credit Kabhi Debit,,

6 - Cash Balance wale Profit Le Jayenge,,

7 - Hum Tax dE chuke Sanam,,

8 - Kyun TeLi ho gaya na?,,

9 - Mein Acounts ki Diwani hon,,

10 - Kaho na Depreciation hai...!!!
Women :Sir,Main Apne Larke Ka Naam Kiya Rakhon?
Sir,Iska Naam Peter Rakh Do..!
Women:Mera Doosra Larka Bhi Hai jo Iska Twin Hai..
Main Us Ka Naam Kiya Rakhoon?
Sir:Uska Naam Repeter Rakh do.
A BOY ON DATE WID GIRL in CaR,

Jan!

Mene tum sy 1 baat chupai k

i''m already married

Girl: oh God TUM Ne TU DaRA HI DIYA,Main samjhi ye car tumhari nai he