A man robs a bank and takes hostages.
He asks the 1st hostage, "did you see me rob the bank".
The hostage answers "yes". The robber, promptly, shoots him in the head. Then he asks the 2nd hostage if he saw him rob the bank. The hostage answers, "no, but my wife did" . . . ;->
A man to Santa:
Your friend is kissing your wife in your home.
Santa rushes home and came back within
half an hour and slapped the man
and said:
“He’s not my friend.”