A guy takes his wife to a football game for the first time.
After the game he asked his wife how she liked the game.
Oh, I really liked it, she said, but I just couldnt understand why they were fighting for 25 cents.
What do you mean?
They kept screaming:Get the quarter back! Get the quarter back.
Santa had a dream in which someone murdered him.
Next day he closed his bank account. Know why?
Because the bank’s slogan was:
We make your dreams come true…
1 day u’ll B srprisd 2 c ME beside U.
U & ME laughing,
U & ME crying,
U & ME dreaming,
U & ME holding on,
U & ME…
just U & ME sitting in a MENTAL HOSPITAL & ME CHECKING U.