Titanic was sinking.
An englishman asked Santa, “How far is land”?
Santa: 2 KMs.
Englishman jumped into sea.
Englishman: Now, which direction (left or right)?
Santa: Downwards!
"Doctor, are you sure I''m suffering from pneumonia? I''ve heard once about a doctor treating someone with pneumonia and finally he died of typhus."
"Don''t worry, it won''t happen to you. If I treat someone with pneumonia he will die of pneumonia only." . . . ;->