I had once thought

I had once thought
I had once thought
that maybe this was life.
No love, no hate, no feelings.
My deepest feelings would never be shared.
I was so frightened;
I didn''t know what to do.
Scared of this one man all my life.
Face my fear, I told myself!
But it''s so hard, so confusing.
Do you know what it''s like
to wonder in darkness?
It never stops, never ends.
It goes on like a story with no ending.
Do you know how it feels
to be afraid of something
that you can''t do anything about?
That you didn''t ask for or even think about?
Do you know what it''s like? Do you know how it feels?
It''s complete and pure emptiness!
  

Jun, 18 2010     624 chars (4 sms)     3043 views       English Poetry

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At every sunset, I cry and plead
Slow and just living, and yet I bleed
With angst, do I cry, take me home.
Please take me away from this old age home.
The past time has
departed, so that it no
longer is; and the future is
not in existence,
in that it has not yet
arrived. And even the
present is not... in that it
does not abide. For see-
ing that the present does
not stand fast, and does
not abide even for an in-
stant, how can it be said
to be present, when it
cannot stand fast for one
moment?
Hours Pass By

I think of u in my arms
and what it would be like 2 make love
I think of u raising my SEED
and what they d be made of
I think of how alone I was
before u came 2 be
I think of the joy I felt
when u said u thought of me
I?m proud 2 be the heart u
choose 2 make a friend
hours pass by and cupid cries
until we meet again
Still I smile
And pretend to be carefree ,
But whats behind ?
Nobody ever tried to see .

Like a poison inside me
Still I wanna you to hold ,
Desperately I wanna breath
But my breaths have turned frozen and cold .

Through my body
Like blood you run ,
Now you are my night
And the only sun .

So don''t feel hurted
And never do leave my eyes ,
A bond of love
Ours relation is
You wonder if its real
how do you know it''s true?
sorry honey,
I can''t answer that for you

but Ill ask you some questions
lets see how you do,
lets see if this guy
is really right for you

ok, what do you see
when you look into his eyes?
can you imagine if
he wasn''t in your life?

do you get butterflies
when you hear his name?
does he tell you all the time
that he feels the same?

do you restless
every second your apart?
last one girl,
can you feel it in your heart?
Where do you run in such a hurry?
To the embracing arms of god,
Or to relish a feast, spread by the lord
Is there someone there to ferry?
To another bank of this mad river.

"Going Home", you say, and I stare
"What is home?", I''ve never known
"What do you do there?", I seek by my own
"It`s night!, I am going to sleep"
I died in laughter that day and my life long.

Slept, I have all this life, right here
On this solid ground, slept in peace.
No lack of mirth, in my hungry soul
No lack of bruises, on my lonely body
And, Slept I have in peace, right here.

"Why on the streets?", you demand to know
"Help yourselves", you seem to say
"Why, Where and How?", my eyes plead
Do you have the time to show me the way?
Poor Helpless soul, you simply walk away.
In those moments of truthful silence
With deepest desires, eyes filled
Of passion, of treading the world hence
Life seems still, as courage is instilled.
.
Unlike an obstacle, the waves really charm
The salty breeze seems so hard to resist
Will they hug me and set my mind at calm ?
Or will I drift away, like the sand from my fist ?
.
Far ahead, I see a ship set sail
As the birds make a ruckus, much like the waves
From the sea, shall be born a great tale
Else the road lies dark to long forgotten graves
.
The lonely wave grows really tall
My thoughts they are, my life they make
In drenched glory, I yearn to see it all
Or is this just a mirage for my earthy sake ?
Who Is Here? Who Is There?

In the Garden, when the autumn wind blows,
In the bird’s voice there is wailing and lamentation.

In the lovesick nightingale’s song there is a call,
with a different effect, a different mark.

Still, the nightingale is yearning for the love of the flower.
Still, the salamander is nesting in the oven.

Still, Mansur is hanging on the gallows.
He says: “I’m the Truth,” yet the secret (truth) is hidden.

Still, Zulaykha is not afraid of rebuke.
Still, Yusuf is evading Zulaykha.

Still, the Christian maiden is breaching Sheikh San’an''s faith.
Still, the Sheikh is tending her swine.
You showed me the sea..though your depiction
Her turbulent surface..chides my emotions
Her serene belly...recalls my intentions
The setting sun...reminds me of lost time
Fistful of sand...coerceing to let bygones be
Wave''s dance with winds...accentuates team-spirit
Sails at full mast.....suggests effeciency at peak
"A Heart" Dies When It Is Not Able To Share Its "Feelings....,

But A "Heart" Kills Itself When Another Heart Doesnt understand Its "Feeling"
When the sunrays hit your eyes
Making the world so bright
And you still see the world
As dark as one sad dark night
When you try to breathe...
...new air of a new era
and the fact is around your neck,
holding it so tight
this is when you know that your life
has changed totally but you dont know
is it a change from right to left
or left to right
from white to black
or.. from black to white.......
I fight 4 d unconventional
as ma lyf is very unconditional
i''ld try 2 b as real as i can
my disadvantage is, i neva knew d plan
i suffered alot buh still i fight
doesn''t matter i win or lose,atleast i tried
at d end ov d day, u just knw 1 thing
tht if u gt sum1,u''ve gt everything
u think tht sum1 is d world, d lyf, ur aim
buh mayb u r wrong ven lyf plays d game
dono,ve u identified me, ma lyfstyle, ma tone?
d thing tht i c is um just alone, awl alone!!!
lukin 4 d future,observing present,faced d past
u dnt gt wt u want, as d lyf passes by so fast!!