I had once thought

I had once thought
I had once thought
that maybe this was life.
No love, no hate, no feelings.
My deepest feelings would never be shared.
I was so frightened;
I didn''t know what to do.
Scared of this one man all my life.
Face my fear, I told myself!
But it''s so hard, so confusing.
Do you know what it''s like
to wonder in darkness?
It never stops, never ends.
It goes on like a story with no ending.
Do you know how it feels
to be afraid of something
that you can''t do anything about?
That you didn''t ask for or even think about?
Do you know what it''s like? Do you know how it feels?
It''s complete and pure emptiness!
  

Jun, 18 2010     624 chars (4 sms)     4150 views       English Poetry

more English Poetry SMS Messages

Good Night My Love!



As I am saying good night at the end of the day,
And you are not here, but many miles away,
My heart is so empty and so lonely inside,
As I wipe away a tear I am trying to hide.

I close my eyes and try to go to sleep,
But with the sadness inside I begin to weep.
Suddenly I remember what you once said to me,
Just meet me in the stars, waiting for you I will be.

When distance tends to keep us apart,
Remember I still hold you near in my heart.
When the night together, can''t be ours,
Just close your eyes and meet me in the stars.

Remembering those words, I begin to smile,
And gently close my eyes, lessening the miles.
I can see the stars, oh how beautifully arranged,
But you are not there, no hug to exchange.
When I fall in love,
I want to be
with her
always;

In happiness,
to smile with her,
and be the one
to hug her near.

In sadness,
to cry with her,
and be the one
to dry her tears.

When I fall in love,
I will spend my
every waking
and sleeping
moments
with her

and catch each
moment in its
eternally
lovely
form.

When I fall in love,
I will miss her
the very moment
I say ''goodbye''

and my heart
will yearn for
the very moment
I say ‘hello''.
These tears won''t fall,
I won''t let them drop,
I''ll wipe my eyes,
I''ll make them stop,

These tears won''t fall,
I won''t let you see,
All of the pain,
That you''ve caused to me,

These tears won''t fall,
I''ll hide them away,
Faking a smile,
For another day,

These tears won''t fall,
I''ll pretend that I''m strong,
But inside I know
That it won''t befor long,

These tears won''t fall,
Nobody will see,
I''ll bury them deep
Inside of me,

These tears won''t fall,
I won''t let them drop,
I''ll wipe my eyes,
And I''ll make them stop
in your eyes, i dont see any love anymore
you are the one i need
and am not the one you are looking for
i begged you before i leave
keep me close, i am so naive
......you pushed me out
and you closed the door
some say love it is a river,
that drowns the tender reed.
some say love it is a razor,
that leaves ur soul to bleed.
some say love it is a hunger,
an endless aching need.
BUT !!
i say love it is a flower,
n u r its only seed.
The ship moves afar as the sun sets to sleep
In my blindness, do I see nature taunt?
My legs in the sand, are down pretty deep
Will I conquer the calm blue sea, and everything beyond ?
Fears wash away from one single touch
Longing to be closer so to your waist I clutch
I shuffle my feet closer to the edge
Fears resurfacing, I can''t fall from this ledge
But then you take my hand into yours, what a sensation!
I peer over the edge for a look at sweet temptation

To Keep suppressing this feeling is to keep telling lies
I don''t feel frightened when you look into my eyes
I lean over the edge just a little more
I hear you call my name again just like before
If I should let go and fall from this ledge above
Tell me, will you reach out and catch me if I fall in love?
What Is, Is In Love (S6)

I’m a moth circling the light of the beloved’s face.
Give me your soul-nourishing hand, and nothing else.

If my body is cut from head to toe,
Every joint is love’s abode, and nothing else.

When the drum of “Am I not your Lord?” was beaten,
to test the friend from the enemy,
when the Friend asked, He heard His answer:
I said the name of love, and nothing else.

(Carl’s English poetic experiment:
I said “trouble!” but that’s
love, and nothing else.)
It is Love
that gives me purpose
to change and grow and learn.
It is Love that guides me on this path
and helps me choose each turn.

It is Love
that gives me courage
to stand against my fears;
to open up my heart to you,
to let you see my tears.

It is Love
that gives me trust and hope
when little thing go wrong.
When distance stands between us,
it is Love that keeps me strong.

It is Love
that offers harmony
and a friendship that is true.
How wonderful that I can share
a Love like this with you... ;->
In those moments of truthful silence
With deepest desires, eyes filled
Of passion, of treading the world hence
Life seems still, as courage is instilled.
.
Unlike an obstacle, the waves really charm
The salty breeze seems so hard to resist
Will they hug me and set my mind at calm ?
Or will I drift away, like the sand from my fist ?
.
Far ahead, I see a ship set sail
As the birds make a ruckus, much like the waves
From the sea, shall be born a great tale
Else the road lies dark to long forgotten graves
.
The lonely wave grows really tall
My thoughts they are, my life they make
In drenched glory, I yearn to see it all
Or is this just a mirage for my earthy sake ?
|*| Love Lost |*|

I Am Not Yours,
Not Lost In You,
Not Lost,
Although I Long To Be Lost As A Candle Lit At Noon,
Lost As A Snowflake In The Sea.
You Love Me, And
I Find You Still A Spirit Beautiful And Bright,
Yet I Am I, Who Long To Be Lost As A Light Is Lost In Light. Oh Plunge Me Deep In Love --
Put Out My Senses,
Leave Me Deaf And Blind, Swept By The Tempest Of Your Love,
A Taper In A Rushing Wind.
If only the world could see what I feel
then, would the world, know who I am
I''ve loved, lost and feared the world
for it is sometimes too much to bare

Control, power, is what I fear
for I am weak inside and full of pain
I shout and cry, but knowing
there is nobody there to hear me
I swallow the shame and anger
that lies beneath me

I am lost to reality and living in time
Though I am struggling through life
and all that it offers, I am only human
and that is what makes me . . . Me.

Still, I wish for the happiness and pleasure
that I have earned, but realize that, I have
not yet overcome the world''s greatest challenge

Love! and how to accept it -
I am ready to face my fears