I had once thought

I had once thought
I had once thought
that maybe this was life.
No love, no hate, no feelings.
My deepest feelings would never be shared.
I was so frightened;
I didn''t know what to do.
Scared of this one man all my life.
Face my fear, I told myself!
But it''s so hard, so confusing.
Do you know what it''s like
to wonder in darkness?
It never stops, never ends.
It goes on like a story with no ending.
Do you know how it feels
to be afraid of something
that you can''t do anything about?
That you didn''t ask for or even think about?
Do you know what it''s like? Do you know how it feels?
It''s complete and pure emptiness!
  

Jun, 18 2010     624 chars (4 sms)     3184 views       English Poetry

more English Poetry SMS Messages

1st impression:

Just when I thought I d seen it all
our paths crossed and met
and I Knew from the First glance
that u would be hard 2 4get
your eyes attracted me First
but you reeked of sultry confidence
I couldn t wait 2 touch lips
and kiss with my Heart s intentions
when we did it was what I expected
and 4 that moment we erased the tension
of the awkwardness of First Date Jitters
and the initial Blind Date First impressions
we kissed again and I felt the passion
and this was CUPID s blessing
Life taught me many things,
Some sweet moments some bitter ones,
Some I remember some I forgot,
But what remained always was our precious friendship.
I had once thought
that maybe this was life.
No love, no hate, no feelings.
My deepest feelings would never be shared.
I was so frightened;
I didn''t know what to do.
Scared of this one man all my life.
Face my fear, I told myself!
But it''s so hard, so confusing.
Do you know what it''s like
to wonder in darkness?
It never stops, never ends.
It goes on like a story with no ending.
Do you know how it feels
to be afraid of something
that you can''t do anything about?
That you didn''t ask for or even think about?
Do you know what it''s like? Do you know how it feels?
It''s complete and pure emptiness!
if one day you feel like crying...
call me.
i dont promise you that i will male you laugh,
but i can cry with you.

if one day you want to run away....
dont be a afraid to call me.
i dont promise to ask you to stay,
but i can run with you..

if one day you dont want to listen to anybody,
call me...

i promise to be very quiet.

but
if one day you call me
and there is no answer....

come fast to see me,
perhaps i need you.
can you see it in my eyes??

you dont knw how i m feelin
i have yet to vocalize
desire deep inside me
can you see it in my eyes??
i tremble when i m near you
heat travels up my thighs..and i want you with an urgency
that i just cant descirbe
dare i reachout to touch you ..do u think you''d realize
how much i want n need u
can you see it in my eyes
i long to say i luv u
but am scared of ur reply
terrified like a child
i have become paralaysed
the camaouflaged emotions lead to pain n slient cries
and yet i just cant tell u..
dont you see it in my eyes??
confessin through dis poem
my dilemma summarized
SmiLiNg Is NoT My ReAliTy,
ThIs Is HoW I PrEtEnD To Be,
By NiGhT I CrY MySeLf To SlEeP,
WiD My GoD FrOwNiNg At Me,
DrOwnInG In A FlOoD Of TeArS,
BuT TeArs Are My DeStInY,
My ViSiOn A BlUr As I FuLLFiLL,
AnD ThIs Is HoW I MeAnT To Be,
My LiFe UnWoRthY,
My SelF To KiLL,
ExIsTeNcE A ToRtUrE I MuSt EnDurE,
As U RegArDeD SuiCiDe As SiN,
I M NoT AgAiNsT U My HeArt Is PuRe,
FaTe Is MoCkInG WiTh An EviL GriN,
SuRrOuNDeD In A BlAcK NeSs So DeEp,
I WaLk,I SeE But SuRvIvE No MoRe,
I M DeAd InSiDe,
In DaRkNeSs WeEp,
YoU KnoW I LoVe U,
LIkE EvEr BeFoRe,
FoRgIvE Me As In My GrAvE I LaY,
FrEe Me oF ThiS PaIn AnD LeT Me DiE,
I JuSt CaNT BaRe It AnY MoRe:''(
i never get to tell you what I really need to say
How I long to hold you each and every day
You mean more to me than words can ever express
Without you my life would be a total mess
As I look into your eyes, and at your perfect face
I know there will never be anyone to take your place
No matter what problems we may go through
That place in my heart will always be for you
If I am having a hard time letting you in
It''s because I have played the game, and never win
Your love means so much to me
I just don''t know how to make you see
I don''t care what people say
We can stick together anyway
Every normal person has 72 heart beats, but for myself its 73. the extra 1 is ur smile. So don’t stop ur smile, it will affect my heart.. Keep Smiling
Love Me In The Springtime,
When All Is Green & New,
Love Me In The Summer,
When The Sky Is Oh So Blue,
Love Me In The Autumn,
When The Leaves R Turning Brown,
Love Me In The Winter,
When The Snow Is Falling Down.
Love Me When I''m Happy,
And Even When I''m Sad,
Love Me When I''m Good,
Or When I''m Oh So Bad,
Love Me When I''m Pretty,
Or If My Face Is Plain,
Love Me When I''m Feeling Good,
Or When I''m Feeling Pain.
Love Me Always Darlin'',
In The Rain Or Shining Sun,
Love Me Always Darlin'',
Until All Our Life Is Through,
Love Me Always Darlin'',
For I''ll Be Lovin'' You.
n0 l0ve,
n0 life,
n0 pain,
n0 Peace,
n0 happeyness,
n0 Sadness,
n0 Hate,
n0 m0re can happen t0 0ur fate,
Emoti0nless s0me pe0ple stand t0day

n0 l0ve,
n0 life,
n0 pain,
n0 Peace,
n0 happeyness,
n0 Sadness,
n0 Hate,
n0 m0re can s0me 0ne be heald in arms and feel the l0ve,
and relese the hate,
n0 m0re tears t0 cry,
All is t0 live f0r,
Is the day we die,

n0 l0ve,
n0 life,
n0 pain,
n0 Peace,
n0 happeyness,
n0 Sadness,
n0 Hate,
n0 m0re but its all Fake
Em0ti0nless is h0w we all stand t0day.
I fight 4 d unconventional
as ma lyf is very unconditional
i''ld try 2 b as real as i can
my disadvantage is, i neva knew d plan
i suffered alot buh still i fight
doesn''t matter i win or lose,atleast i tried
at d end ov d day, u just knw 1 thing
tht if u gt sum1,u''ve gt everything
u think tht sum1 is d world, d lyf, ur aim
buh mayb u r wrong ven lyf plays d game
dono,ve u identified me, ma lyfstyle, ma tone?
d thing tht i c is um just alone, awl alone!!!
lukin 4 d future,observing present,faced d past
u dnt gt wt u want, as d lyf passes by so fast!!
Four candles were talking to each other

1st-"I am PEACE, no one needs me" & it went off..
2nd-"I am FAITH, nobody believes in me" & it went off..
3rd-"I am LOVE, nobody cares for me" & it went off..
4th-"I can light the other three because I am HOPE & I last forever!"

Life is tough, sometimes impossible to live.. but never lose hope.
I wish that your candle of HOPE lights all your other candles and keep them glowing.
Stay Blessed :)