I had once thought

I had once thought
I had once thought
that maybe this was life.
No love, no hate, no feelings.
My deepest feelings would never be shared.
I was so frightened;
I didn''t know what to do.
Scared of this one man all my life.
Face my fear, I told myself!
But it''s so hard, so confusing.
Do you know what it''s like
to wonder in darkness?
It never stops, never ends.
It goes on like a story with no ending.
Do you know how it feels
to be afraid of something
that you can''t do anything about?
That you didn''t ask for or even think about?
Do you know what it''s like? Do you know how it feels?
It''s complete and pure emptiness!
  

Jun, 18 2010     624 chars (4 sms)     4409 views       English Poetry

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As I walk through the valley
of the shadow of LA
The footsteps that were next to me
have gone their separate ways
I''ve seen enough now
to know that beautiful things
don''t always stay that way
I''ve done enough now
to know this beautiful place
isn''t everything they say
Good Night My Love!



As I am saying good night at the end of the day,
And you are not here, but many miles away,
My heart is so empty and so lonely inside,
As I wipe away a tear I am trying to hide.

I close my eyes and try to go to sleep,
But with the sadness inside I begin to weep.
Suddenly I remember what you once said to me,
Just meet me in the stars, waiting for you I will be.

When distance tends to keep us apart,
Remember I still hold you near in my heart.
When the night together, can''t be ours,
Just close your eyes and meet me in the stars.

Remembering those words, I begin to smile,
And gently close my eyes, lessening the miles.
I can see the stars, oh how beautifully arranged,
But you are not there, no hug to exchange.
i sit in the park where i dwell,
for this girl i love so well.
she took my heart away from me,
now she wants to set me free.



i see a boy on her lap,
she says things to him she never said to me.
i ran home to cry on my bed,
not a word to mother was said.


father came home late that night,
he looked at me from left to right.
he saw me hanging from rope,
he took his knife to cut me down,
and on my dress a note was found.



dig my grave,dig it deep.
dig my grave, from head to feet.
and on the top place a dobe.
and remember this, i did for love.
Words twist and tumble
Through my mind
But I can''t grab the right word
Or the right line
So we sit
In silence
But it’s not uncomfortable
In fact I love it
You rest your head on my chest
As we lay here
Lovers entwined
Hearts tangled
You raise your head
And look into my eyes
And I see our love
Almost as if it’s a real force
I don’t ever want to lose this moment
You lay your head on my chest once again
And now I can feel your heartbeat
And my hearts skips
And I finally find the words I’m looking for
I love you
Burning pain
Misery and tears
My heart torn by broken promises
Your lies echo through my mind
No place to run
No place to hide
I try to ignore my pain
Daily my tears flow
My beauty marred
My spirit crushed
Your anger
Your criticism
Your violence
I can do no right
I try to please, to make things acceptable
For you
To no avail
How to end my suffering
There is no respite
By you, my deep love forgotten
There are others who fill your thoughts
Who make you smile
|*| Love Lost |*|

I Am Not Yours,
Not Lost In You,
Not Lost,
Although I Long To Be Lost As A Candle Lit At Noon,
Lost As A Snowflake In The Sea.
You Love Me, And
I Find You Still A Spirit Beautiful And Bright,
Yet I Am I, Who Long To Be Lost As A Light Is Lost In Light. Oh Plunge Me Deep In Love --
Put Out My Senses,
Leave Me Deaf And Blind, Swept By The Tempest Of Your Love,
A Taper In A Rushing Wind.
I don''t think you will
ever fully understand
how you''ve touched my life
and made me who I am.

I don''t think you could ever know
just how truly special you are
that even on the darkest nights
you are my brightest star.

I don''t think you will ever fully comprehend
how you''ve made my dreams come true
or how you''ve opened my heart
to love and the wonders it can do.

You''ve allowed me to experience
something very hard to find
unconditional love that exists
in my body, soul, and mind.

I don''t think you could ever feel
all the love I have to give
and I''m sure you''ll never realize
you''ve been my will to live.

You are an amazing person
and without you I don''t know where I''d be.
Having you in my life
completes and fulfills every part of me.
Are you still mine?
Cause there many...
Fantasies thoughts going through my head,
As all I do is think of you...
As I''ve hungered,
For your loving burning touch,
As I need your love so badly,
Now till the end of time,
I am waiting for you with open arms
To embrace you with wings of love,
To hold you deep within my soul,
To kiss you without control.
Just being near you,
And be able to behold your touch,
Takes me to another dimension,
But, time just moving so slowly,
To feel the heat of your passions.
I do want you to know...
I will always love you,
That you are all I have ever long for,
And crave, and yearn...
That you are the ANGEL of my dreams,
The one I have search all my life,
That every day, more and more,
I''m falling deeply in love with you!
How come I don''t know my own pain?
I''m the doctor and the remedy myself.

I wandered around the universe.
For the friend''s sake I have broken my heart.

Oh poor me! I didn''t know
I ''m the beloved and the lover myself.

Mazun, I made myself degraded.
I chose to be in love.

I gave my sole to the beloved.
Soul myself, devotee myself.
Time for you and time for me,
And time yet for a hundred indecisions,
And for a hundred visions and revisions,
Before the taking of a toast and tea.
The day I met u I saw strength
and I knew from that point on
that u were pure woman 2 me
possessing a spirit that was strong
I want smiles 2 replace the sorrow
that u have encountered in the past
and since it was strength that attracted me 2 u
it will take strength 2 make it last
My negative side will attempt 2 change u
but please fight that with your all
it will be your strength that keep us both standing
while others around us fall
For you I would climb
The highest mountain peak
Swim the deepest ocean
Your love I do seek.

For you I would cross
The rivers most wide
Walk the hottest desert sand
To have you by my side.

For you are the one
Who makes me whole
You''ve captured my heart
And touched my soul.

For you are the one
That stepped out of my dreams
Gave me new hope
Showed me what love means.

For you alone
Are my reason to live
For the compassion you show
And the care that you give.

You came into my life
And made me complete
Each time I see you
My heart skips a beat.

For you define beauty
In both body and mind
Your soft, gentle face
More beauty I''ll ne''er find.