SmiLiNg Is NoT

SmiLiNg Is NoT
SmiLiNg Is NoT My ReAliTy,
ThIs Is HoW I PrEtEnD To Be,
By NiGhT I CrY MySeLf To SlEeP,
WiD My GoD FrOwNiNg At Me,
DrOwnInG In A FlOoD Of TeArS,
BuT TeArs Are My DeStInY,
My ViSiOn A BlUr As I FuLLFiLL,
AnD ThIs Is HoW I MeAnT To Be,
My LiFe UnWoRthY,
My SelF To KiLL,
ExIsTeNcE A ToRtUrE I MuSt EnDurE,
As U RegArDeD SuiCiDe As SiN,
I M NoT AgAiNsT U My HeArt Is PuRe,
FaTe Is MoCkInG WiTh An EviL GriN,
SuRrOuNDeD In A BlAcK NeSs So DeEp,
I WaLk,I SeE But SuRvIvE No MoRe,
I M DeAd InSiDe,
In DaRkNeSs WeEp,
YoU KnoW I LoVe U,
LIkE EvEr BeFoRe,
FoRgIvE Me As In My GrAvE I LaY,
FrEe Me oF ThiS PaIn AnD LeT Me DiE,
I JuSt CaNT BaRe It AnY MoRe:''(
  

Jun, 18 2010     672 chars (5 sms)     3225 views       English Poetry

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At every sunset, I cry and plead
Slow and just living, and yet I bleed
With angst, do I cry, take me home.
Please take me away from this old age home.
In those moments of truthful silence
With deepest desires, eyes filled
Of passion, of treading the world hence
Life seems still, as courage is instilled.
.
Unlike an obstacle, the waves really charm
The salty breeze seems so hard to resist
Will they hug me and set my mind at calm ?
Or will I drift away, like the sand from my fist ?
.
Far ahead, I see a ship set sail
As the birds make a ruckus, much like the waves
From the sea, shall be born a great tale
Else the road lies dark to long forgotten graves
.
The lonely wave grows really tall
My thoughts they are, my life they make
In drenched glory, I yearn to see it all
Or is this just a mirage for my earthy sake ?
Even if the candles fade away
and winds of silence start blowin
and rotten leaves start to
embrace ur coffin
and roses that lay by ur grave
begin to wither petal after petal
Even if the clouds passing by
shed their tears in blind agony
and even the stars
that we used to see together
that sparkeled our love
begin to glimmer
like as if they were never there
even if the suns of happiness
leave the evenings of ur heart
and the autumns of death
triumph the valleys of ur life
"October''s The Month
When The Smallest Breeze
Gives Us A Shower
Of Autumn Leaves.
Bonfires And Pumpkins,
Leaves Sailing Down -
October Is Red
And Golden And Brown."
- Can Teach Songs

"Listen! The Wind Is Rising,
And The Air Is Wild With Leaves,
We Have Had Our Summer Evenings,
Now For October Eves!"
- Humbert Wolfe
in your eyes, i dont see any love anymore
you are the one i need
and am not the one you are looking for
i begged you before i leave
keep me close, i am so naive
......you pushed me out
and you closed the door
It makes me gloomy
It makes me cry
That you are a charmer & your love was a lie ...

You''re my love & without you
I''LL DIE ... I''LL DIE ...

But now waves of time has shown me tha path
It''s not death, where I want to resort ...

My lovely anguish told me to what to do?

I DON''T LOVE YOU BUT
I LOVE TO ABHOR YOU ...
MoM I LoVe YoU



Growing up you were so dear,
things to me you made so clear.
You clothed me with things to wear,
comfort you gave through the years.

Mother your love is sincere,
you taught me how to persevere.
To me now they do adhere,
no punishment too severe.

Mom I love you, never to stray,
I have taken in your loving way.
I bless you mother as I pray
When the sunrays hit your eyes
Making the world so bright
And you still see the world
As dark as one sad dark night
When you try to breathe...
...new air of a new era
and the fact is around your neck,
holding it so tight
this is when you know that your life
has changed totally but you dont know
is it a change from right to left
or left to right
from white to black
or.. from black to white.......
Give me death! I pray every day
Leave me not, to sigh, in every way
Seen I have, those beautiful days
Those little red flowers in an awesome place.

Why these windows, in front of me?
And all the beauty outside, and free
Ran, I have upon the soft wet ground
I walk far no more, just safe and sound

My beloved ones, have all gone away
Laughter, I yearn to hear, to be merry and gay
Tears, I have in my heart and dreams too
Like my youth, won`t the pills vanish too?

Years and years, have I spent in glee?
To sit here and look at the old worn tree
Searched I have, for a leaf of hope,
A lover from the skies, with whom to elope
These tears won''t fall,
I won''t let them drop,
I''ll wipe my eyes,
I''ll make them stop,

These tears won''t fall,
I won''t let you see,
All of the pain,
That you''ve caused to me,

These tears won''t fall,
I''ll hide them away,
Faking a smile,
For another day,

These tears won''t fall,
I''ll pretend that I''m strong,
But inside I know
That it won''t befor long,

These tears won''t fall,
Nobody will see,
I''ll bury them deep
Inside of me,

These tears won''t fall,
I won''t let them drop,
I''ll wipe my eyes,
And I''ll make them stop
Have you ever been in love?
so in love that you couldn''t form those words
thoughts buzzing in your head that you dare not speak
afraid to speak because you might say something dumb
you crawl into your own world
keep your feelings to yourself
no one knows how you feel inside, sometimes not even yourself
you giggle crazily when he is around
you feel like you will die when you hug goodbye
at the end of the day your going crazy with anticipation for tomorrow
you gather all your courage to finally say those words
you grab your pen and spill your emotins onto the paper
expressing all your love on one sheet of paper
its agony to hand it over to the one you love
the fear of rejection is greater than any pain you know
you finally let go and walk away
Daffodils



I wander''d lonely as a cloud

...That floats on high o''er vales and hills,

When all at once I saw a crowd,

...A host, of golden daffodils;

Beside the lake, beneath the trees,

Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.



Continuous as the stars that shine

...And twinkle on the Milky Way,

They stretch''d in never-ending line

...Along the margin of a bay;

Ten thousand saw I at a glance,

Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.